Title: January 6th Insurrection Was Just Spartan Race Capitol Edition! Owner: Wade Bachelder Value: $10.00 URL: Visit URL
An official report has been released with new details about January 6th 2021.
There was no insurrection but a Spartan Race Capitol Edition.
The race began with an exciting pep talk about the “race” and then it began.
The participants raced down Pennsylvania Avenue toward the Capitol building.
The racers attacked Pennsylvania Avenue with great enthusiasm where they were met with their first obstacle. The WALL.
The next obstacle was immediately after as they fought their way through a wave of Spartan actors portraying Police officers which forced them to manage their way through a window into the Capitol.
Once inside the Capitol, all hell breaks loose. There is a specified path, but another wave of Spartan “Police” tried to lure the racers away from completing the rest of the obstacles. Their goal is to remove them from the building.
Other obstacles included Senate Chamber Desk Rifling, Great Rotunda Dump, Statuary Hall Tumble and Bringing Down the House.
Upon exiting the building, the racers were met and arrested by the Spartan "Police" and taken off site where they collected their Spartan T-Shirt, Mug, Key Chain and Handcuffs.
Platty's Editor Note: This sounds like an action packed day of fun and excitement!